If his first 27 days of fatherhood are any indicator, Ashton Kutcher is doing a pretty excellent job. And he performed one of the most essential dad duties Tuesday night on Conan, embarrassing the hell out of his infant daughter by talking about her on national television.
Kutcher confessed that his little one with fiancée Mila Kunis wasn’t always going to be named Wyatt Isabelle Kutcher. In fact, they had a totally different moniker picked out.
“When we were pregnant, the name didn’t fit the energy we were feeling,” he said. “One night, Mila was like, ‘This is not the name.’ … I had to get the creative juices going, so we were going to a Lakers game, and I just started listing off anything and everything I saw: ‘sign, truck, wall, door’ … She [was] like, ‘Shut up!'”
But then, an epiphany!
“I was like, ‘OK. I got a really dumb idea. What about Wyatt?'” he recounted. “And she goes, ‘That’s it.’ … We gave her the middle name Isabelle after Mila’s grandfather, who was Yitzhak, and so it has a little heritage.”
Hopefully little Wyatt likes her name because Ashton and Mila have already carved out quite the online persona for her, having bought URLs like WyattKutcher.com and WyattIsabelle.com and reserved Instagram and Twitter handles for their daughter.
“I don’t want a porn site with my daughter’s name on it,” Kutcher said. “It’s unacceptable to me, and it’s not going to happen.”
Wyatt’s humiliation didn’t end there. Kutcher also brought up his daughter’s crying habits, which will surely get her some sneers in baby yoga.”I have a personal, wanting to be a hero, ego thing and [fatherhood] fulfills all of that,” Kutcher boasted. “Staying home for the first couple weeks, I’ve learned the little things that will calm the baby down so I feel like I’m a baby whisperer now. I like to give the baby to my friends and let it cry for a second and be like, ‘Let me just take care of that.'”
Yeah, Esmeralda Amada Gosling is going to give Wyatt such a hard time for that one.